Seven More Awards Due President Barack Obama (Update)

 

Seven More Awards Due President Barack Obama (Update)

Posted on October 9, 2009 by hotoffthepress2

Citizens of the world awoke to find President Barack Obama had won both the Nobel Peace Prize and two Cy Young Awards. Because no one likes surprises, I’ve combed the internet to uncover news about seven more awards (below) our nation’s 44th president will receive this year:

7. World Series MVP — By way of Executive Order, President Obama will add himself to the roster of the winning team in Major League Baseball’s fall classic and then, via an unprecedented public-voting process supervised by ACORN, he will be named the “Most Valuable Player of the 2009 World Series”.

6. Friend of Terrorists Award — For exemplary leadership of the U.S. military effort in the Global War on Terror Overseas Contingency Operations, President Obama will receive the top award from Osama Bin laden, founder of the terrorist organization behind the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001.

5. The Roman Polanski Year of the Child Award — Based upon his demonstration of exceptional skills as a parent of pre-teen girls, President Obama will be named the first recipient of the award recently established by members of the defense team for film maker and accused child molester Roman Polanski [Note: Polanski lawyers deny that naming Obama as recipient of the award stands as a thinly-veiled effort to obtain a presidential pardon].

4. Nobel Prize for Economics — After demonstrating to the world through bailouts, stimulus packages and other actions that have resulted in a rapid devaluation of the dollar, President Obama will be awarded the Nobel Prize for Economics;

3. Miss America — After losing so much money in the down economy, Donald Trump will agree to award President Obama the title of “Miss America” in exchange for a federal bailout;

2. Best Actor — The Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences will award President Obama its Academy Award® for Best Actor for his work as president of the United States; and

1. Congressional Medal of Honor — After doing more than any previous occupant of the Oval Office to weaken the nation’s standing in the world, President Obama will award himself the nation’s highest honor just for having survived the blowback.

As more awards news surfaces, I’ll report it here.

* * *

UPDATE 10-9-09 at 2:54 p.m Central: As promised, I’m delivering more awards news! See Still More Awards Coming to President Obama.

Be Sociable, Share!